Thanks to a recent study by the Harvard Business School, many couples have begun to reevaluate their relationship and their preconceived notions on what causes divorce and what makes a healthy relationship. This is because, unlike what many of us thought was the main reason for divorce, finances, as it turns out, it might actually be chores.
Yes, chores. This is because of a phenomenon known as, “exchange-orientation.” Essentially, as it turns out, as we go about our daily life, we keep score of our contributions to relationships, and if the other partner is not carrying their weight, arguments are sparked. And, according to Harvard Business School, it is these arguments that begin the big arguments that can lead a couple down the path toward divorce.
What are the most tracked chores?
Surprising, the top spot was not cleaning the bathroom, it was simply doing the dishes at 57%. Cleaning the bathroom was only at 36%. Apparently, the dirty sink led many to feel overwhelmed, especially if it was primarily the spouse’s dirty dishes. This was the most common spark of resentment cited by HBS. Next is taking out the trash and cleaning the kitchen, generally, at 46% and 42%, respectively. Rounding out the list were laundry (29%) and shopping for groceries (26%).
Taking stock of our relationships
For Saint Cloud, Minnesota, couples, this HBS study is likely eye opening because it really drives the idea home of a death by a thousand cuts. Most of us tend to focus on the big things, like wonderful anniversary presents and experiences, big vacations, etc. But, just doing the dishes more can have a lasting positive effect on Minnesota relationships.